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  1. #1
    Advanced Taster
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    183

    Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    I opened my liquor cabinet this afternoon -- hey, I had a dozen people over for a tasting last night and my dinner table was littered with about 20 bottles, so I was cleaning up -- and poor little Binny's 4R OBSK must've felt such ennui that we neglected him that night, because immediately upon opening he took a leap from the top ledge of the cabinet.

    Now that ledge is easily 6' off the floor. And the floor is hard wood.

    As often happens in such NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO situations,
    things
    shifted
    to
    slow-
    motion
    as
    the
    bottle
    fell.

    Can you picture it?
    Me watching it fall,
    fumbling to grab it,
    but it still falling,
    me yelling
    "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
    pitched a few octaves lower
    due to the slo-mo?

    The bottle shattering,
    the glorious
    juice
    dripping through the wood slats
    into the basement,
    never to be tasted by anyone
    but
    roaches?

    Now
    I don't know
    if it's the 4R bottle design,
    some fluke of gravity
    or
    divine intervention,
    but
    it just skipped,
    playfully,
    across the floor
    like a slick rock on a placid lake,
    hit
    a nearby table leg, and
    did about a dozen
    reverse 360 spins

    before coming to a rest, shaken and frothy but unharmed.

    Fuck,
    it's 3pm but I HAD
    to drink deeply from my friend
    to celebrate my friend
    surviving his suicide attempt.

  2. #2
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    362

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    Good post. The bottle is probably sturdier than others. That, plus I'm guessing it wasn't tile it landed on- most likely wood or linoleum?
    Last edited by trumpstylz; 02-03-2012 at 13:24.

  3. #3
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Piqua OH
    Posts
    843

    Question Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    The god of bourbon, protecting one his loved ones
    The liver is evil. It must be punished...

  4. #4
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Dallas, TX
    Posts
    468

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    I have one little tear just at the edge of my right eye.

  5. #5
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    365

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    Close cousin of Angel's share......

    Divine intervention!!
    "Civilization begins with distillation."

    William Faulkner

  6. #6
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Chicagoland
    Posts
    435

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    That is beautiful. Takes me back to the commercials that ran in the '80s to introduce Pepsi in plastic two-liter bottles -- the clumsy kid elbowed the bottle off of the dinner table, but the family marveled as it bounced rather than break.
    "Delicious... bourbon. Brownest of the brown liquors... so tempting. What's that? You want me to drink you?" -Lionel Hutz

  7. #7
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Raleigh
    Posts
    503

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    Reminds me of the Crown Royal print ad... "You ever seen a grown man cry?" I dropped bottles of WTRR 101 and EWSB 1990 on the driveway not long ago. Didn't cry though... Was pissed, and a few choice words were said. Probably scared the neighbors... LOL

  8. #8
    Virtuoso
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Mesa, AZ
    Posts
    1,424

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    On Christmas Eve, I found the last remaining bottle of EC18 on a shelf at Costco and thought it must be a sign that the bottle was meant for me. A few minutes later, I had another shopper, who was looking in the opposite direction they were walking, bump into me and send the bottle flying out of my arms to explode all over the floor. It was all I could do to avoid flying into a raging rant. My blood pressure didn't fully recover until the next morning! Happy to hear you had better luck with a considerably more valuable bottle!
    -Brian-

    "A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it."
    -Agent Kay

  9. #9
    Virtuoso
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Plano, TX
    Posts
    1,070
    I dropped a 4RSmB from about 4' once and the bottle bounced once then lay flat on the tile. My heart jumped a little too

  10. #10
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    327

    Re: Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

    I picked up a $125 dusty bottle of tequila for a buddy last month, and on the way into my house I dropped it on the concrete steps. It chipped the bottle a bit, but didn't break. Whew.

 

 

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