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  1. #121
    Guru
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    Mar 2012
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    PacNW
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    2,284

    Amusing, yet scary...

    Well, that was a short-lived bourbon reviewing career:

    http://fredminnick.com/robert-parker...key-exclusive/

    (if true)
    ¡Geaux Tigers! - ¡Visca el Barça!

    "Really though, my hands are sore. The tool was doing it's thing with a flex hose." -Barrel_Proof

  2. #122
    Connoisseur
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    Mar 2013
    Location
    Central Florida
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    562

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    Dang. And here I was gearing up to accuse every verbose-hyperbolic-pedantic tasting reviewer a "Parker".

    I guess that won't be happening now.
    He made himself another drink and thought how much better the Perrier was than anything else you could put in whisky... Hemingway

  3. #123
    Advanced Taster
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    221

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    RobourbonParker has since reviewed McDonald’s McRib, calling it the “Colonel EHTaylor of the sandwich world,”
    LOL!!!!

  4. #124
    Virtuoso
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Mesa, AZ
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    1,446

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    Quote Originally Posted by Alden View Post
    Dang. And here I was gearing up to accuse every verbose-hyperbolic-pedantic tasting reviewer a "Parker".

    I guess that won't be happening now.
    I think you can still use that. We'll know what you're talking about and will be suitably amused.
    -Brian-

    "A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it."
    -Agent Kay

  5. #125
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Toledo, OH
    Posts
    831

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    Parker gets credit for the quality of his tasting notes even though there are so many errors of fact--not to be confused with opinion. Looking at his list of bourbon descriptors reminded me of the Buzzword Generator List. For you young SBers, this was a Chinese menu for ambitious bureaucrats who wanted to sound impressive. The procedure was to select one term each from columns A, B, and C. String them together and you could sound like the pointy-haired boss in "Dilbert."
    If God made anything better than bourbon he must have kept it for Hisself.

  6. #126
    Guru
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Jackson, MS
    Posts
    12,329

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    Fake Twitter account, the internet doth humble us all.

  7. #127

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    If his online publication continues to write reviews, I suspect he'll hire a respected whisky person. For the wine reviews, Parker hired renowned reviewers to cover particular geographies. For example, Jay Miller covered Spain and his reviews were published under Parker's domain. It would make sense for him to do the same in whisky, bourbon and other spirits. I don't think he could have expected the viral pushback he received from the online bourbon community.

  8. #128
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Toledo, OH
    Posts
    831

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    I'd like to apply for the job as bourbon contributor to the domain. By way of audition, here are my tasting notes for Very, Very Old Fitzwaller: Redolent of caramelized dark pitted fruits; smoky but with much less char than you might expect in a whiskey that spent more than four years in the barrel; silky and gorgeously textured on the mid palate but just a skosh harsh on the back palate; still, velvety and opulent; complex and pungent with tremendous rye spice elegantly balanced by wheat. I rate it a 97.
    If God made anything better than bourbon he must have kept it for Hisself.

  9. #129
    Guru
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Jackson, MS
    Posts
    12,329

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    And if you can detect the rose petals (Grandifloras naturally) the score rises to a 98.

  10. #130
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Location
    Central Florida
    Posts
    562

    Re: Amusing, yet scary...

    Quote Originally Posted by Flyfish View Post
    I'd like to apply for the job as bourbon contributor to the domain. By way of audition, here are my tasting notes for Very, Very Old Fitzwaller: Redolent of caramelized dark pitted fruits; smoky but with much less char than you might expect in a whiskey that spent more than four years in the barrel; silky and gorgeously textured on the mid palate but just a skosh harsh on the back palate; still, velvety and opulent; complex and pungent with tremendous rye spice elegantly balanced by wheat. I rate it a 97.
    You, sir, have just been awarded the first "Parker" by the SB community.

    It's a 10" golden colored plastic statue of Rbt Parker, with a pot belly, and when you push the belly, the tongue protrudes and it makes a slurping sound.

    Congratulations.

    Please see the cashier on your way out.
    He made himself another drink and thought how much better the Perrier was than anything else you could put in whisky... Hemingway

 

 

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