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  1. #1
    Enthusiast
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Eastern MA
    Posts
    409

    You’re Pretty Serious About Your Bourbon If…

    You’re Pretty Serious About Your Bourbon If…


    • Given a bottle of Bourbon, you can name the distillery that made it and when you last hung out with the Master Distiller.
    • Local liquor stores call YOU when they run out of hard to find bottles.
    • Distilleries send you hand written Birthday and Christmas cards.
    • You’ve weaseled your way into most of the major distilleries and drank straight from the barrel. Sometimes straight from the still.
    • Your Bourbon Bunker puts most liquor stores to shame.
    • Many of the local liquor distributors and brand reps know you on sight.
    • You arrange business trips to hit the cities with the best Bourbon hunting.
    • You know all the airline regulations regarding the amount of liquor you can check through and carry on.
    • You know about the new products coming out months before the distributors and liquor stores.
    • Your dining room walls are decorated with barrel heads signed by the master distillers.
    • Your ten year old daughter knows how to properly nose a glass of Bourbon.
    • Very few bottles in your Bunker can be obtained at even the largest liquor stores.
    • Some or all of your pets are named after major brands.
    • You have the owner or manager of all the major liquor stores in the state in your cell phone.
    • Been to all of the major distilleries. More than once.
    • Your personal inventory is so large that if Prohibition was reinstated tomorrow you wouldn't be affected for many, many years.
    Mike

    "You're the best bourbon drinkers ever!" - Margo (waitress at Bourbon's Bistro in Louisville)

  2. #2
    Bourbonian of the Year 2002 and Guru
    Join Date
    Sep 1999
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    12,656
    I think you've just described everybody on this site. Except I don't have any kids or pets.

  3. #3
    Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Brisbane, AUSTRALIA
    Posts
    1,597
    Well, I just got a puppy......suggested Elijah as a name but that didn't happen.......
    "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day" - Frank Sinatra

  4. #4
    Bourbonian of the Year 2010 and Guru
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Kentucky!
    Posts
    4,750
    Quote Originally Posted by cowdery
    I think you've just described everybody on this site. Except I don't have any kids or pets.
    No pet, kids or barrel heads. But the rest sounds vaguely familiar
    2010 Bourbonian of the Year

    As long as you have good whiskey you're not "unemployed", you're "Funemployed!!!"

    I'm no Pappyophile

  5. #5
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    651
    My 4 year old weighs in each evening on what would be the appropriate bottle choice, although I think she is heavily influenced by label design.
    Mark/Nebraska


    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take... but by the moments that take your breath away. 11/25/2004

  6. #6
    Virtuoso
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Chicago SW 'burbs
    Posts
    1,178
    Quote Originally Posted by MikeK
    • Your personal inventory is so large that if Prohibition was reinstated tomorrow you wouldn't be affected for many, many years.
    I'm not quite to that level yet, but I'm getting there.

    Then again, sometimes I think that Prohibition 2.0 might be just around the corner. If Texas is any indication, it's already on its way.

    After reading about the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Comission's Gestapo-style raids on bars, where they'd bust bar patrons for public drunkeness without even bothering to measure BAC, even busting hotel patrons in hotel bars!, on the flimsy excuse that they might drive home drunk (Department of Pre-Crime, anyone?), I'm frickin' glad I don't live in Texas, and I have no intention of visiting Texas, either.

    "I don't really understand the hateful outrage. I don't understand, 'Die in a fire.'"
    -TABC spokeswoman Carolyn Beck
    It's quite simple. Die. In. A. Fire.
    Oh no! You have walked into the slavering fangs of a lurking grue!

  7. #7
    Apprentice
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Posts
    41
    Quote Originally Posted by HighTower
    Well, I just got a puppy......suggested Elijah as a name but that didn't happen.......
    We inherited a betta fish that was part of a wedding centerpiece (!) last month.

    I named it Overholt

  8. #8
    Guru
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Las Vegas NV
    Posts
    2,099
    My 6 year old can pour it neat, and on the rock, one cube only.

    Some visitors get a bit uncomfortable.

    Is this a problem?
    Emancipate yourself from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds.

    Bob Marley.

  9. #9
    Connoisseur
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    651
    Maybe they are afraid some will spill.
    Mark/Nebraska


    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take... but by the moments that take your breath away. 11/25/2004

  10. #10
    Guru
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Moscow Mills, MO
    Posts
    2,507
    I think you missed one: You have something bourbon related in every room of the house, including the guest bathroom and laundryroom. (GUILTY)
    Dane
    I don't drink to excess. But I'll drink to most anything else.

 

 

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