Favorite Whiskey Quotes

[Bennett]

I've seen some good quotes on some people's signatures... I'm wondering what other whiskey quotes, lyrics or slogans make you smile.

Best,

Amy

[clayton]

"Never eat on an empty stomach." - W.C. Fields

[Hedmans Brorsa]

"If the ocean was whisky and I was a duck,

I'd dive to the bottom to get one sweet suck.

But the ocean ain't whisky and l ain't a duck,

so we'll round up the cattle and then we'll get drunk."

(With a lot of hiccups in between.) From "Rye whiskey" by Tex Ritter.

Really,to appreciate it fully it has to be heard. It´s as much a performance as it is a song.

[texascarl]

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he was single.

H. L. Mencken

I was brought up to believe that Scotch whisky would need a tax preference to survive in competition with Kentucky bourbon.

Hugo L. Black

&

'A woman drove me to drink and I didn't have the decency to thank her.'

W.C. Fields

"What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?"

W.C. Fields

[camduncan]

It's not a quote, but anyone who has seen the Cougar Bourbon television add that was aired in Australia about 12 months ago will definately understand the quote "5 Cougars thanks!"

[hookfinger]

"If the ocean was whisky and I was a duck,

I'd dive to the bottom to get one sweet suck.

But the ocean ain't whisky and l ain't a duck,

so we'll round up the cattle and then we'll get drunk."

(With a lot of hiccups in between.) From "Rye whiskey" by Tex Ritter.

Really,to appreciate it fully it has to be heard. It´s as much a performance as it is a song.

Also performed by Johnny Winter and Nick Cave (with small variations in the lyrics.)

[Edward_call_me_Ed]

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains, you never change your socks

And little streams of alcohol come a-trickling down the rocks

The brakemen have to tip their hats and the railroad bulls are blind

There's a lake of stew and of whiskey too

And you can paddle all around 'em in a big canoe

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

Ed

[chasking]

“…there’s nothing more romantic than to sit on the back porch in the moonlight with a bottle of whisky, while the riddles of the universe unravel before your eyes.â€

---from The View from Chickweed’s Window, by Jack Vance.

He raised his highball. Marvellous stuff, whiskey. The elixir of dreams. Incorrect. Not dreams. Whiskey sharpened the senses, slowed time. […] Sense and sensation...He closed his eyes, sipped his highball. The flavor of oak and mellow grain. The wetness of water, flowing over his tongue.

---from The Flesh Mask, also by Jack Vance.

[Gillman]

My quote is not textual or fully attributed but it goes like this: in Gerald Carson's Social History of Bourbon Carson cites a commentator who noted that a group he was familiar with took pride in not showing their liquor no matter how much they drank but that oddly it never occurred to them that abstaining was the surest way to demonstrate a sober condition.

Gary

[Bennett]

“Champagne's funny stuff. I'm used to whiskey. Whiskey is a slap on the back, and champagne's a heavy mist before my eyes.â€

Jimmy Stewart, The Philadelphia Story

[Oi_Lung]

Justice Hugo Black: "I was brought up to believe that Scotch whisky would need a tax preference to survive in competition with Kentucky bourbon."

[ratcheer]

My favorite is from Winston Churchill. I have described it in more detail in a posting somewhere in these forums a few years ago. But, briefly:

He was travelling by train with Harry Truman. The president suggested having a whiskey and Sir Winston was delighted. Upon his first taste, he exclaimed, "This isn't whiskey, its bourbon!"

Tim

[camduncan]

If anyone was wondering what I meant by "5 cougars thanks" - it was an add campaign that was run on Australian television last year. It showed a group of 5 people at a table in a bar who get one of the guys to order some drinks. He stands in line going over the order to himself and notices everyone in front is ordering 5 cougars and looking puzzled as they leave the bar with their drinks. He gets to the front of the line, sees the barmaids singlet top and orders 5 cougars thanks.....

(ok, so it was funier seeing it acted out than it reads above...)

[gr8erdane]

Thanks for the explanation Cam, but I'd think the commercial would be funnier if the person buying for five only brought TWO COUGARS back each time....but then that's American Redneck humor. Thank goodness you're supposed to be 21 to get into this site or I'd be plumb embarrassed for saying that.

[Hedmans Brorsa]

it was an add campaign that was run on Australian television last year.

Cam, would you happen to know if this ad is available for download somewhere? The only site I found charged you for downloading it (No thanks!).

As Chairman (and the only member) of the Cougar Appreciation Society of Scandinivia I, of course, have a natural interest in watching it.

[camduncan]

Cam, would you happen to know if this ad is available for download somewhere? The only site I found charged you for downloading it (No thanks!).

I've tried to find this add online a few times now with no luck. I even tried asking frineds & family if they could remember having a video tape of a program that had the add in it, but again no luck

[Edward_call_me_Ed]

“A man should always carry a small bottle of whisky in case of a snake bite. A man should also carry a snake.†W.C. Fields

[cas]

"Whiskey is for drinking, water is for fighting".

I've heard this attributed to Mark Twain, but read somewhere recently that it can't actually be documented that he is the originator.

Craig

[Edward_call_me_Ed]

Dylan Thomas, last words:

"I've had 18 full whiskeys; I think that's a record."

Not something I hope to emulate...

Ed

[boone]

"The difficulty lies not in the use of a bad thing, but in the abuse of a very good thing."

From the temperance address by Abraham Lincoln...

Holds true with alot of stuff...

Bettye Jo

[cowdery]

"Bourbon does for me what the piece of cake did for Proust."

Walker Percy, 1975

[hwalker]

Ditto Chuck,

But there is this related "non-bourbon" quote too...

"Anybody who monkeys around with gin and egg white deserves what he gets."

[Gillman]

An older drinks writer, Englishman Frederic Martin, when told there is credible evidence whisky can improve in the bottle and be "laid down" like fine port said, "Pity I can't wait".

Gary

[bullitt]

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. ~W.C. Fields
 

[fishnbowljoe]

One of my favorites, and it's bourbon specific to boot. 

"A man can take a little bourbon without getting drunk, but if you hold his mouth open and pour in a quart, he's going to get sick on it."

Lyndon B. Johnson

Cheers! Joe