View Full Version : Suicide watch: Binny's 4R OBSK

02-03-2012, 14:14
I opened my liquor cabinet this afternoon -- hey, I had a dozen people over for a tasting last night and my dinner table was littered with about 20 bottles, so I was cleaning up -- and poor little Binny's 4R OBSK must've felt such ennui that we neglected him that night, because immediately upon opening he took a leap from the top ledge of the cabinet.

Now that ledge is easily 6' off the floor. And the floor is hard wood.


Can you picture it?
Me watching it fall,
fumbling to grab it,
but it still falling,
me yelling
pitched a few octaves lower
due to the slo-mo?

The bottle shattering,
the glorious
dripping through the wood slats
into the basement,
never to be tasted by anyone

I don't know
if it's the 4R bottle design,
some fluke of gravity
divine intervention,
it just skipped,
across the floor
like a slick rock on a placid lake,
a nearby table leg, and
did about a dozen
reverse 360 spins

before coming to a rest, shaken and frothy but unharmed.

it's 3pm but I HAD
to drink deeply from my friend
to celebrate my friend
surviving his suicide attempt.

02-03-2012, 14:21
Good post. The bottle is probably sturdier than others. That, plus I'm guessing it wasn't tile it landed on- most likely wood or linoleum?

Phil T
02-03-2012, 14:22
The god of bourbon, protecting one his loved ones:cool:

02-03-2012, 14:32
I have one little tear just at the edge of my right eye.

02-03-2012, 15:25
Close cousin of Angel's share......

Divine intervention!!:cool:

02-03-2012, 16:20
That is beautiful. Takes me back to the commercials that ran in the '80s to introduce Pepsi in plastic two-liter bottles -- the clumsy kid elbowed the bottle off of the dinner table, but the family marveled as it bounced rather than break.

02-03-2012, 17:16
Reminds me of the Crown Royal print ad... "You ever seen a grown man cry?" I dropped bottles of WTRR 101 and EWSB 1990 on the driveway not long ago. Didn't cry though... Was pissed, and a few choice words were said. Probably scared the neighbors... LOL

02-05-2012, 09:44
On Christmas Eve, I found the last remaining bottle of EC18 on a shelf at Costco and thought it must be a sign that the bottle was meant for me. A few minutes later, I had another shopper, who was looking in the opposite direction they were walking, bump into me and send the bottle flying out of my arms to explode all over the floor. :smiley_acbt: It was all I could do to avoid flying into a raging rant. My blood pressure didn't fully recover until the next morning! Happy to hear you had better luck with a considerably more valuable bottle!

02-05-2012, 13:06
I dropped a 4RSmB from about 4' once and the bottle bounced once then lay flat on the tile. My heart jumped a little too

02-05-2012, 13:49
I picked up a $125 dusty bottle of tequila for a buddy last month, and on the way into my house I dropped it on the concrete steps. It chipped the bottle a bit, but didn't break. Whew.

Bourbon Boiler
02-05-2012, 15:34
Good post. Had me on the edge of the couch.

Old Lamplighter
02-05-2012, 16:25
Deja Vu all over again...well kinda, but with a tragic end instead. This jarred my memory to a few years back when I bumped into a 2004 edition Saz 18 that I had put in a 'safe' place in the back of my storage room which shares a small portion of the homestead's slab foundation. It was the day after Thanksgiving and I was in there searching for the Christmas lights to put on the house. It teetered back n forth as I bent down - in what seemed like slow motion - to grab it....but, to no avail as a protruding box blocked my arm just enough to feel the top slip out of my fingertips as it fell sideways to the concrete. It did not fall far or long but must have hit just right as the top 1/3 of the bottle separated from the remainder while the precious contents flowed across the flow underfoot. :cry: I did not know whether to grab a towel & squeeze it into a bowl, or, lay down on my side with a straw.

Anyhow, thanks a lot for bringing back a sad, sad day for me!!!:lol: I think I better go pour a strong one to the memory :drink:

02-05-2012, 20:19
I got a friend a Pappy 20 a few years ago and he put in the back of his SUV. When he opened the back, well, hope the driveway was appreciative. Sad, but true.
Glad your 4R survived the potentially deadly drop.

02-05-2012, 21:21
This thread and a trip to my cousin's house today reminded me of something.

We were headed to my cousin's house for a party. My wife loves to bake and wanted to surprise them with a pie. She decided on a new recipe from her beloved pie recipe book and got all of the ingredients. Unfortunately a few missed items sent me to the store not once, but twice. At this point we were late so I sent a text to my cousin letting him know we'd be late because we were making a dessert to bring.

She finished the pie. We got everything out to the car and she sat the pie on top of the car. I warned her that that was what happened before people left their coffee mugs and cell phones on the car to be destroyed. She said she wouldn't forget and put the dogs in the back seat. I got in and so did she. I backed up down the drive-way and CRASH. The pie plate landed on the drive way shattering to hundreds of pieces and sending lemon chess pie everywhere. (We didn't even get to try any of the pie; if the pavement wasn't enough to stop me, the tiny glass shards throughout certainly were.)

We were late and pieless and had to explain the story to everyone. We were both in a terrible mood afterward, but now it seems kind of funny. She made the pie again and it was delicious.

02-07-2012, 20:34
This is easily one of the most suspenseful and well written posts I've seen on SB.

Ruby K
02-13-2012, 14:48
This could be the best straightbourbon.com post ever.