View Full Version : What would you do?

02-15-2001, 08:31
Last Friday night I arrived home late in the evening to find my wife and a few of her friends in the basement having a grand old time. They had obviously been partaking of some alcoholic beverages and were a fun group to visit with. I was starting to have a good time and getting into the party mood when my world crashed down before my eyes. There on the bar was a bottle of 20 yr Hirsch empty with empty coke cans scattered around it! The room started to spin and I am sure my face lost all of it's color. I made some excuse to leave and stumbled upstairs so I would not make a scene (after grabbing a bottle of Kentucky Spirit from the cabinet) and nursed my anger with a little touch medicinal nectar. Now my question: what would you have done? I am eager to hear your reactions.

Laughin' and Scratchin'


02-15-2001, 10:44
Well Den you had the good sense to aviod actions incuring the death penality. This would be grounds for divorce in the family & domestic courts of Bourbonia.
How many friends did she have? Were the all women? Were they waring any pants?
Could this have been a simple Saint Valentine's Day Massacre of a fine bottle of bourbon? Were they waring any pants? Did you get any viedio? What's your address? Were they waring any pants?

Linn Spencer

Have Shotglass. Will Travel.

02-15-2001, 11:39
Hey Linn,
Even if they were all nekid as jaybirds, it wouldn't have been worth the price.
I suggest a big lock for your special stash, a nearly starved pitbull chained to the
locked cabinet, then get a deevorse and party on!!!

02-15-2001, 11:50
If they were not wearing pants I would not have noticed the empty bottle. At least not until the next morning. There were 5 of them and all of them were fully clothed. The lock on the cabinet is a must and the pit bull is an option that I will consider. (But to feed a pit bull would cut into my Bourbon purchasing power.) There are a lot of things to consider here.....I need a drink! How 'bout some hirsch............now I'm mad again.

02-15-2001, 12:07
You're makin' this up, right? You've joined a Stephen King wannabee club and you wanted to try out your contribution on us, is that it? Remember your wife's mother's birthday?? Welllll, maybe you should have :-))
Does she have a good sense of humor? I sure wouldn't put it past Linda to set something up like that just to see my reaction.


02-15-2001, 14:07
Well... Even though I joke about it you won't find me hitting the Henry Clay or the Pappy 20 with diet sprite! I value my life a little too much for that!

I think that you just need to stress what is an appropriate bourbon for a mixer!!! I applaud your self restraint.

I do now enjoy Bourbon straight but when mixing I use Evan Williams 7yr old 90 proof. When I am out of Evan Williams John gets a kick out of me saying Im out of bourbon. I just need to go downstairs and there are many bottles to choose from!


02-15-2001, 19:45
It is your own fault for letting someone who mixes bourbon with COKE, for god's sake, even near a bottle of Hirsch. Next time hide the good stuff and put a cheap bottle of bourbon or some of the Canadian you have been trying to get rid of out where your wife can find it.
Mike Veach

02-15-2001, 22:44
>There on the bar was a bottle of 20 yr Hirsch empty with empty coke cans
>scattered around it!

I say give them the benefit of the doubt. I'm sure they drank it with just
a splash of water, and drank the cokes on the side. See now, makes you feel
better already. Just don't ask any questions. It's better that way.

02-16-2001, 06:12
Hell man you showed a lot of self control and you sure picked a good Bourbon to mull this over. I know you mad becasue she drank the Hirsch,. but is that the root of your anger. My Beloved Hirsch is gone or are you mad because she may have drank it with Diet Coke. Creggor.

02-16-2001, 06:20
Said Mike, "It is your own fault for letting someone who mixes bourbon with COKE, for god's sake, even near a bottle of Hirsch. "

I agree completely with Mike. Anyone with even a modicum of taste and culture knows that only Pepsi-Cola &reg has the delicate nuances of flavor and aroma to properly compliment the powerful taste of such fine bourbons as Hirsch or Jack Daniel's. You're wife's friends (who probably forced her into it) are barbarians.


02-16-2001, 07:38
Here is a good one...and a good reason to quit asking questons and move on with life....I now find the only reason they were mixing the hirsch with coke was THEY RAN OUT OF CAPN' MORGAN! Not only did they mix the hirsch...but they were too drunk to taste it! Well I guess I'd better get over it..unless I want to buy another pretty young thing a house! I did have a demeanor changer last night..some eagle rare..before that I had a little Evan Williams Single Barrel. I keep coming back to this one, but can't seem to get past the veeeeeerrrrry long finish that it has. Does anyone else have this problem with the EVSB?

02-16-2001, 08:36
Well, if you are married, then technically the bottle was half hers, so she certainly had a right to drink the stuff. This of course does not give her the right to abuse your share.
I think the only event that will assuage your feelings is the acquisition of two new bottles of Hirsch. Explain to her that since the bottle is currently in a state of volumetric degradation -- a state she induced -- it is clearly her responsibility to rectify the situation. Of course complete rectification will include some compensation for damages as well as the restoration of your stock.

"Get your shoes and socks on honey ... we're takin a road trip".


Jim Butler

02-16-2001, 10:22
"Since you are married, half the Hirsch was hers"
Reminds me of an old Laurel and Hardy skit where they agreed to share a soda since they only had enough money
for one - Laurel drank the whole thing because his half was on the bottom of the glass.

Anyway, it shows us one thing for sure. You have a lot better taste in bourbon than wimmen.

Maybe education would work, show her the price tag on the Hirsch and the the price on some old bar bourbon you
must have hanging around. Explain how when mixed with cola, it hardly matters any more what is in the glass.
If that doesn't work, lock your stash in the gun cabinet.

02-16-2001, 17:08
See, the Capn' Morgan bit takes it into a whole nother realm. Now you just have to shake your head and marvel at the mystery of love. After all, the Hirsch-ness of the Hirsch was still there, only obscured (by more than the Coke, it sounds like). It was still conveyed and received, and maybe even experienced on a subconscious or unconscious level. Whiskey exists to be drunk. The Hirsch realized that noble destiny.

--Chuck Cowdery (http://cowdery.home.netcom.com)

02-17-2001, 09:21
that is exactly why my best bourbons are in a special liquor cabinet in my bedroom. Jo knows the difference but we've had adult offspring live with us and I don't put anything I don't want consumed out in the bar.

However having been married longer than most people can imagine, if my wife drank something particularly dear to me I'd let it go. She's more dear than bourbon. But then she knows more about bourbon than most women, 'cept Boone & Linda, Brenda & probably Vickie (though Vickie doesn't drink it straight), and a few others.


02-17-2001, 09:26
well said, Chuck


02-17-2001, 09:34
My wife Jo is to be commended for her suggestion on this matter. She suggests you and your wife attend the Ky. Bourbon Festival, visit D.Marie's in Louisville, come with us to a private tasting at Buffalo Trace, and generally share together the difference between expensive vs. inexpensive, good vs. "less good" bourbon. She suggests bourbon is not a "Man's world."

By the way, I rarely tell this but my high-priced physician brother once insisted I drink Windsor straight because he felt is was a fine Canadian whiskey. I don't know when he went on their payroll but it was all I could do to go along with his suggestion to keep peace in the family.