View Full Version : Ramblings from the Sofa

11-01-2007, 19:48
My wife and I finally purchased a home in the burb of Connecticut. We moved in about a month ago and have finally settled in, as in no more living out of boxes. The house is by no means new, built in 1960, nestled in a very quiet, quaint neighborhood. As far as neighborhoods go, I haven't seen one in 5 years and let me just state for the record, it's damned nice to be living in one. Prior to the burbs my wife I lived in New Haven, where Routes 91 and 95 were in our backyard - heck, we didn't have a backyard - and the walk to our front door was 52 stairs.

Anyway, with a new house brings new responsibilities, problems, stresses, etc. As we've begun to settle in to our new lifestyle - only two steps up to bring in the groceries instead of 52 - there has been a nuisance that has and will continue to bug (keyword) all bourbon lovers. That is...the fruit fly! Wow, these little guys are annoying. At first, my wife and I thought it was no big deal, just one or two of these little things here and there, mostly in the kitchen. But then we realized that, no, it's not one or two, more like a colony of these sweet-sippin' bourbon lovers cowering around. Why, the past two nights, two of these little fellas decided to stop by for a drink, un-announced, mind you! Yup, right into my tulip glass for a quick little dip and drink.

Now, keep in mind, I certainly don't mind sharing my bourbon. Heck, I'm usually not picky with whom I do it with. But, a man's got to draw the line somewhere. AND, the line has been drawn, my friends! War has been declared on these rebelious little, beedy, red-eyed bourbon theives.

This morning, I went online to find out how to get rid of these pesky little flying aces - not really, they more or less fly like I walk after a few stiff drinks. That ain't good flying fellas! So, with a homemade fruit fly catcher in hand, once the kids were put to bed, I set the trap down near the kitchen sink. The device is as simple as simple gets: a coffee mug with plastic wrap on top with holes punched through. Inside the mug is not bourbon, but instead Heineken Lite with a little dish soap.

The premise is that the fly makes a pit stop on top of the mug, landing on the plastic. It smells some sweet wetness which it craves for food and laying eggs. It takes a sniff around to find a hole to burrow through to get to the liquid and low and behold it's stuck, can't get out. For some reason, the fly could sniff it's way into the mug but not out of.

This little concoction was placed at 8:40PM this evening, and revamped at 9PM (the holes needed to be larger for these little guy to crawl through).

So far, so good. I've trapped a few in the liquid and last I checked 4-5 were sniffing around on top trying madly to find a way into the Beer and soap.

As I was going conclude by saying that I hope I can rest assured that by tomorow evening the only lips to touch my bourbon would be mine. But, no. As I sit here writing, deep down in my basement, one of these clumsy little winged ants decided to take a swim in my Weller!

Oh well. Time to check the trap, and maybe set a few dozen more.

Good night all! Sleep comfortably in knowing that your bourbon is safe.

The other Mark Brown

P.S. Another just flew by, probably looking for the closest watering whole its friend just found.

11-01-2007, 20:49
Mark that's some funny S%&*! I was having this problem the other night as well and I used Basil Haydens just a splash and water it down, I had three by morning but have not seen any since. Next time I will try the mug and cling wrap.

" Excuse me, but there's a fly in my soup! Shhh don't tell or everyone will want one."


11-01-2007, 21:44
We have fruit flies in the house sometimes but they, and all the other insects, have never made it inside my glass. I think part of the reason for this is because I typically drink my bourbon in front of my pc and it's 2 20" monitors. I think the flies are drawn to the screens because of their brightness, the only other place I see them is by the lights in the ceiling. Also, I usually drink out of a snifter so I generally have it my hand unless I'm typing or playing a game so that the bourbon gets warm, if you normally set it down when you're not drinking from it you might try that, if possible.

11-01-2007, 22:40
Congrats on your new house, that's great. We get fruit flies up here in NH, too. The best advice I can give you is to keep any fruit or vegetables in the fridge for a few weeks, and keep your compost outside. Cold weather is coming, the little buggers won't be around for much longer, I guarantee.

11-01-2007, 22:48
I'd kill to live in the burbs. I currently live in a warehouse. No AC, No Heat, heck, no insulation! Thank the lord I live in San Diego near the ocean where it's tempret all year. But I"m tired of it.

And when I see fruit flies, it means the banannas have gone bad.

11-02-2007, 02:58
I would declare Jihad on them for getting in my Weller!:lol:
Kill those little bastards!


11-02-2007, 06:20
I'd kill to live in the burbs. I currently live in a warehouse. No AC, No Heat, heck, no insulation! Thank the lord I live in San Diego near the ocean where it's tempret all year. But I"m tired of it.

And when I see fruit flies, it means the banannas have gone bad.

Wow! Sounds kind of cool though (no pun intended). How's the warehouse in the summer months, too hot or just right?

As far as living in the burbs, it doesn't get much better than this, in my opinion. It's so quiet. Actually, our street is off a busy road so we can hear the cars going by but it's quiet as a church mouse compared to two major highway, one in each ear, back in New Haven.